July 28, 2015

What a World of Whimsy

“The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age,which means never losing your enthusiasm.” -Aldous Huxley.

Those of us who manage to hold onto our childlike wonder, become like a magnet,and light to others. It is with the simple joys of a child that life becomes and remains magical. Why is it that imagination(or creativity) is so often scolded rather than fostered? It seems that the World is uncomfortable with the daydreamers. However, before We are able to do anything we must imagine it first. No great feat(personal or otherwise) has been accomplished by following the rules,playing it safe,or by thinking within the box. Unfortunately people like to see others fail, rather than flourish. Therefore, they try to negate the grand ideas of dreamers. Whether it’s by telling you that you cannot accomplish something or children in school(a rigid place) teasing the often aloof daydreamer of the group. The more opposition you’re met with is a clue that your on the right track. Although, it’s unwise to be bullheaded and stubborn. At any rate, just don’t give up on your dreams. It is known that fear and doubt only serve to derail you,so ignore those false directions! Surround yourself with that which is good, and turn a blind eye to the doubters. Life is far too short to waste any time with the fears of someone else. Fill your mind with encouragement and positive thoughts. It helps tremendously to fix your thoughts on what is true,honorable,right,pure,lovely,and admirable(Phil 4:8). Personally I’ve found that by just having lovely thoughts and objects around me, it makes a difference. More recently I acquired an old 1960’s vanity, which I filled with lovely objects that lift my spirit,either with memories or simply their aesthetic. We(family) refinished it back to it’s original splendor, and then I proceeded to decorate it with what makes me feel good(see below). Some people create shrines to a specific God,but I think it also worthy to create a shrine to all that makes you feel good(an idea here)whether, you choose a physical collection of objects, or a vision board you cannot go wrong. Before something can manifest in the physical, it’s imperative we visualize it,and this is why imagination is so vital to the human experience. Dear friends,don’t be swayed by the cares of this world,because if you let it,it will choke the dreams from behind your eyelids. Therefore, keep your eyes set on the sky above,and shoot for the moon!

No doubts,

Here is a peek at my “shrine.”

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEusoSyYK7k&w=560&h=315%5D

July 22, 2015

Use the China

“Happiness resides not in possessions, and not in gold, happiness dwells in the soul.

-Democritus.”

Most of us believe We have posessions,but the truth is We own nothing. This life is transient and We can take nothing with us. Therefore, don’t save your best china(or clothes)for holidays or dinner guests, but use it for every meal. I think everyone has the tendency to save their nicest belongings for special occasions. However, each day you have to inhabit and enjoy is a special occasion. Therefore, wear that lovely outfit or dust off your jewelry box and don that pretty(expensive)necklace. Nice belongings have a funny way of making us feel better,and each day you should srive to feel as lovely as your expensive(and special)necklace looks. We are perceived by our exteriors,while simultaneously they are influenced by our interiors. If you don’t feel well, you won’t look well. Even when there is nothing to celebrate it’s worth putting in some extra effort. As I’ve learned, material belongings mean very little in the broad scope of things. My valued posessions, pale in comparison to the simple joy of happiness. I’d rather be contented and happy then have a pair of Prada sunglasses. My great Grandmother put on a blouse,earrings,and makeup everyday and then proceeded to sit in Her apartment to watch television alone. She wasn’t getting dressed for others,but for Herself. Even money in all reality is just paper We assign value to, and yet how much violence,crime,and greed is caused by it? I spent time as a bank teller, and after a year it felt like I was playing Monopoly. How silly it is to lust after something as meaningless as money. All the work it takes to earn it,and then buy posessions only to “save,”them? After my injury I used to think how useless one million dollars would be to me. Because, what would I do with it? Would a million dollars restore my body physically? No. Would it bring true happiness? No. I concluded that money was useless to me. I’d no sooner choose to be a happy, and healthy person,then a millionaire. This existence is far too brief to warrant saving pretty dishes in a case to gather dust. My dear friends, don’t save them, but use them for every meal!

save room for dessert,

July 18, 2015

Defying Death

“For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.”

-Khalil Gibran.

Not too long ago a friend asked me if I was afraid of death, and She was right in supposing that I am not. In coming so close to dying and surviving, any fears of it were removed. Although I cannot completely take the credit. Many doctors,nurses,friends,family,and certainly angels were present. There is no reason to fear death because We are immortal. It has been scientifically shown that, energy can neither be created nor destroyed. Therefore, our energy(or soul) must simply be transferred somewhere else. This life is a transient plane. If your circumstances are bad, it helps to remind yourself that nothing is forever. This reminder also helps us to savor the present moment.While no one knows what happens to us when We pass,there are many theories. Some people have actually surmised a weight for our soul( 21 grams). There is no reason to fear. Through my recovery, love has continually carried me through. Each day We have a choice, there is no “wrong side of the bed.” Were not at the mercy of our emotions. This certainly doesn’t mean be robotic,just that We have a choice. I don’t know about you, but I enjoy having some semblance of control. Even though the World seems random or out of control it is oddly enough quite orderly. The Earth obeys laws of nature, the sun rises and sets each day, and even the stars are in patterns that create constellations. Each day your lungs inhale oxygen,you open your eyes, and move about freely(some cannot) We are not like a Fall leaf carried by the wind, so this is actually good news! You can make a conscious decision to be happy(and share it with others)or not. As Yoda says(nerd alert!). Do or do not, there is no try.Hope deferred makes the heart sick, if you follow the ways of love, you can’t go wrong. Each of us have options(yay options!) We can choose life(positivity) or choose death(negativity) Both have been placed before us. To my knowledge you’ll always win when you choose life.

LOVE,

July 15, 2015

Will you still love me

“My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time.”

-Steve Jobs.

Time is one of the most valuable currencies and I felt like I was running out of it. We all fear the process of aging and getting older,in particular women(as I am) because much of our value in society(at least in America) is based on youth and beauty.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_1aF54DO60&w=560&h=315%5D

Therefore, it leaves thousands of the fairer sex trying to stop or regain time from a bottle(thanks beauty industry). After this happened to me(the massive stroke) I had many things never thought of before on my mind. One of those things was the idea and concept of time. A myriad of new questions swirled in my head. “As I get older will I lose my value?” “Has this completely stolen my prime years!?” Time was no longer marching forward for me, it had stopped. Caught in this slow motion car wreck, all I could see were the things I was missing out on. The things I would or should be doing instead of being all messed up in a rehab, hospitals,and doctor offices. All I could see were countless hours of my life slipping through my hands. This is also why I had to avoid Facebook for awhile, if not completely. Because my friends were doing what I was, or would be doing had this not happened to me. This begged the question “Can time be made up?” The answer to that is no, which terrified me. I couldn’t make up or get back the memories of the things I was missing out on. Although others assured me I wasn’t missing out, I was still convinced of it. When your not living your life, but instead watching it go by, nothing seems right. I have never been one to sit on the sidelines, but now I had been “benched.” In my down time I plotted how I was going to get back into the game. In moving forward, it was difficult for me not to look back. If you can just focus on the present at hand and simplify it, you stop marrying your present to your past.( Therefore, the future becomes less scary. This was helpful to me, because I was thoroughly scared of the future. There are certain accomplishments in life that help to propel you and build a solid foundation for the future. However, while I was in the middle of those things I had been practically knocked off of the playing board! Now how was I to make up or regain those lost spaces? I began to keep count of them. For example: “Today was a huge raise!” or “ Oh that was your tropical vacation time.” Seeing these things go by was infuriating. It no longer became a question of how to make those things up, but I was fed up. I concluded that if the massive stroke was an actual person I would exact brutal revenge on them,and likely go to prison for it. Escaping thoughts of my decreasing value as I aged and the seeming loss of my prime years became like treating a disease,using continued treatments. In the form of reassurance and ignoring it as much as possible. If there is a lesson to be learned in all of this I’m still not sure of it, and I wonder, “What prizes will I gain when I finally get to the finish line?

Finish strong!

July 8, 2015

This is not the new me

Usually a makeover is for the better,however sometimes people get “make unders.” I received what I’d call a make under, that came in the form of a massive stroke. In this version rather then getting something better, I have received something terrible(i.e paralysis and a loss of independence). Many people like therapists and doctors, like to allude to this kind of makeover as being my new form. However, just because this is how it is right now, doesn’t mean I have to accept it. To accept bad circumstances, would be a form of settling. In India’s fight against the British Empire, Gandhi declared “They may have my dead body, but they will not have my obedience.” In the same way, the stroke may have nearly ruined my life, but it will not defeat my spirit or break my will. We possess the capacity to evolve and improve, We are never truly stuck. You don’t have to self identify with the lesser. Just as an act of love can create a domino effect for positive change,an act of self defeat can spiral into accepting less then We can achieve. This isn’t to suggest that We should opt to be self serving and greedy(as many already are)but instead to not settle for less then We are capable of.

I certainly don’t declare myself a cripple or identify as being disabled. Instead, I refute these notions and labels, because you will receive what your expecting. Therefore, you should expect more for yourself in life. Many times We create our own limits. Your capable of so much more then your led to believe. Once you start paying attention to your self defeating thoughts or people’s statements, it’s important to negate them either verbally or mentally if you have to. Instead of accepting the statement “You won’t or can’t. change that to “I will or I can.” When you start paying attention to these things, you’ll find that people say(yourself included)these self defeating statements at an alarming rate. Little do people realize that words have power. They have the ability to tear down or build up. As well as the ability to bring into life a new creation. Be careful of the words that leave your mouth and enter your mind. “For out of the heart the mouth speaks.” What’s in your heart will manifest itself into reality. Since this is the case be sure to guard your heart!

Love with no limits,

July 7, 2015

Love is all you need

“The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.”

-Ferdinand Foch.

Even though it’s been over 20 years since his death, John Lennon speaking from the grave is still inarguably correct. Although it seems the obvious conclusion,many people still need reminding. It’s apparent that with so much hurting in the World, love is the solution. If only people knew how much they were loved I suspect you’d see many more happy and healthy people. This is also why people preach of God’s(or “the universes”)love. Because,imagine if We were fulfilled in knowing that were deeply loved? I suspect that those empty places that each of us try to fill(some negatively) would cease to be a problem. Instead of looking outside ourselves or to other people, perhaps We need to turn our gaze inward and upward. To love and be loved is to be fulfilled and contented. The world has made a mess of love, but ideally it’s unconditional love that should be pursued. In order to show this kind of love, We first need to have been loved this way. The World demonstrates that love is simply a feeling or emotion. However, love is learned(a very intelligent therapist told me this). If your not shown or have experienced a healthy love, it’s more likely you will not know how to love others in a healthy way. This is how the problems ensue. If we are not given or shown love properly, that leaves room for dysfunction to creep in. This cycle perpetuates as generation after generation has missed the mark. The world certainly has perfected what love is NOT(see here!) When you know your truly and deeply loved, this carves out a rock solid foundation on which to build the highest of buildings. Without a solid foundation, the building will falter,as do We. When love fills in the gaps it allows us to reach our potential and soar. In order for this to happen, it seems the world and everyone in it needs to be rewired. This seems like an impossible and daunting task,except it isn’t. A revolution never started out of nothing but with one determined person. You don’t need a like minded mob to create change(although it helps)it can begin with one! If you are fulfilled with love, pay it forward and help create a domino effect. A master painting doesn’t just start out as a finished work,it begins with a single small brush stroke. You can be that first brush stroke in a series leading up to a Mona Lisa! There is no time like the present,and why wait until tomorrow for what you can do today?

–Carpe Diem

July 5, 2015

Being Confident Without Being Arrogant

I think We could all use this.😊

July 3, 2015

Ordinary Objects

“To the world you may just be someone, but to someone you may be the whole world.”

It’s strange and sometimes emotional when I unexpectedly(or expectantly)stumble across objects from my life in New York City. Essentially, while I was in a coma(not knowing if I would live)friends and family packed up my belongings and my apartment. So there I was out of commission and my life(hanging in the balance)packed away into numerous boxes. They made the trek from New York, to New Jersey,and then Michigan. While I eventually followed them. From time to time, I will be doing something and randomly see or find something that used to live in my New York apartment. With each object I find,it opens up the flood gate of memories. I can remember when I bought it,where it was from,what I did that day,and see it in it’s place in my apartment. Every object holds a story. Since my life has taken a radical turn, these objects afford me the feelings that I imagine a true explorer gets. When my eyes and fingers touch upon an object from my life before the massive stroke, I feel like an Alien discovering something from a past civilization,of a time gone by. This is because the situation I’m in now seems so unreal. Although the objects are not foreign to me,in some way they are. Why? Because before I was completely unaware of the reality that I’m enduring now. This has given me the point of view of an outsider. When I’m holding something in my hand(or gaze) I can actually take it in as if it weren’t mine. Leaving me to see it in a new way. In the way that an explorer might see something and wonder what kind of life it once had. Although I know the life of my own belongings, I miss the girl that bought them. I’ve been in what seems like an alternate universe for the past two years. I’ve been working on bringing that girl back from the other universe. I remember everything,but even so I worry I’ll forget. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be able to walk freely,tie a shoe,run,jump,and generally be able to control my body. Those objects remind me of the girl I used to be(physically)and I want Her back. I even think back to how oblivious I was to the struggles I now face(and have) wishing I could somehow eke out some of those feelings back into the present. How fortunate I was to be unaware of the things I know now! Those objects hold this other universe within them. I wonder what I would do if I had known then, what I know now. Ah,yes it’s the age old question,and the answer is everything. We take so much for granted, that it’s so important to live and enjoy life as much as you can.

Cheers!

June 25, 2015

At your funeral

“They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I’m going to miss mine by just a few days.” -Garrison Keillor.

I’ll admit, I’ve gotten teary eyed at the thought of my own death and imagining my funeral. However, I didn’t consider how the other people would feel at my funeral. Perhaps this was a sign of my selfishness. As people We all fall prey to this selfish thinking. That is one of the biggest reasons why I don’t bother caring what other people think about me. Because frankly, no one is likely thinking that much about you except yourself! In opening up to other people more I’m more likely to feel emotion for them,which naturally leads to a deeper connection. After being seriously hospitalized I no longer had to imagine my funeral, because I narrowly missed it in reality. This time around in thinking about it I became teary eyed for other people. This is because not too long ago my Father gave me a mental picture of a moment in time that I was not present for. At the time I was in a coma which effectively blanked out a large portion of(20 days)consciousness. In sharing a personal memory He gave me an inroad to his reality during that time. While I was in a coma, He played thumb war with my limp right hand. This is significant because as a child We often played this silly game. All I could think of is how alone in a Hospital room He took my lifeless hand aside and tried to bring some life back into that same small hand, just as it was when I was completely okay. This brought into reality someone else at my funeral. The thought of another person’s heartbreak, brought tears to my eyes and not just for myself. It pained me to think of my sweet Father watching his only child dying,and so badly wanting that little girl of thumb war days back. Imagine if We were all as receptive to each others feelings? How then,would the world change? I wouldn’t doubt that such a thing would make World peace and the need for charities disappear. I have also found that the happier I am in myself and excited about life, I naturally begin to connect with my fellow human beings(or want to for that matter). This is because it has a way of expanding your heart’s boundaries.

Cross your borders!

June 19, 2015

Illusion

“What the eyes see and the ears hear, the mind believes.”-Harry Houdini.

How many of us chase an illusion? We try to emulate the pictures We see in beauty magazines,the lifestyles We see(or think We see)in media,and generally listen to what were subconsciously being told through popular culture. We are inundated with these fairy tale suggestions. The things you aren’t told upfront is that much of it is smoke and mirrors(or photoshop) so this means were essentially spectators at a giant magic show. Once it becomes clear that the picture isn’t authentic, you’ll find that what you already possess is just as good if not better, then what’s in the elusive fairy tale images being paraded on every available space.(i.e television,magazines,billboards,and in retail spaces) I’m not sure how it is in other countries, but in America the media is over saturated into daily living. This has caused some negative effects. Such as unnecessary fear,dieting,and misrepresentation. The fact is, that just like at a magic show,it’s helpful to realize it’s not all realistic. Many people realize this(I hope)but what about those that do not? It takes a certain amount of confidence and experience to not fall prey to these tactics. It’s important to be comfortable in your own skin and not care so much about what other people think. When you possess these things,you’ll find that you’ll be more successful in life. With confidence comes success,and there aren’t too many things better then marching to the beat of your own drum. True beauty is not contained inside the pages of a beauty magazine. However, there is beauty abound in your own brand of unique. A homogenized World full of models would be terribly boring,so do your best not to look like one. It’s in the perceived “imperfections,” that We can find perfection. When you truly see the unique beauty that you possess(i.e like yourself!) the media chatter begins to die down to a barely audible whisper. In other words you’ll be much happier and your corner of the universe will be much nicer!

It’s amazing what happiness will generate in your life. I have found that happiness attracts positive situations,good people,more confidence,and success! Once your able to tune out(the media junk) and get on your own wavelength, happiness becomes a renewable resource.

Cheers and tune out!

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