Follow the Yellow Brick Road

You’ve always had the power dear, you just had to learn it for yourself,” -Glinda the Good Witch.

This post will not be as long as my journey after stroke. Much like Dorothy’s house was picked up in a storm, my life too was hauled off. Except, it was by a stroke rather then a fictional tornado.

In surviving the fall from the sky, I seemingly eradicated the grim reaper much like Dorothy’s witch. In my travels since emerging from the wreckage, I too have been periodically tormented by fear. While fear is not easily destroyed by a bucket of water as in the film, it can be destroyed by dousing it with its opposite. The substance of love, hope, kindness, and healthy support. You must ignore that nagging voice in your head that insists everything will go wrong, you won’t be able to achieve your goal, and life is just happening to you. That’s a funny thing because you have the ability to exercise your will and build the road that you desire. The fear you encounter while working away on your goal can be diffused by declaring the opposite of what it’s trying to convince you of. In fact as you follow this path treating yourself with love, and receiving it from others, you’ll stumble across some breakthroughs. Not only will you experience breakthroughs, but you will also meet people to help you of an excellent caliber. People who possess hearts full of love, have infinite patience, and a true desire to help. You won’t meet these people while following the path of least resistance. As it turns out after surviving the equivalent of a thousand foot fall from the sky, you can learn to walk again(literally) just as a bird with a mended broken wing will eventually spread its wings and fly. Life doesn’t happen while you stand back and watch but when you press into it, even if it pushes back. Most of my success has happened when I dove into something head first. If you’re afraid then do it afraid! You’ll be surprised by just how much your capable of. However, if you let the fear lay a brick wall in front of you rather then a road you’ll never know. So as the song goes…. “Follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road, follow, follow, follow, follow…. And I’m pretty sure there are no lyrics concerning coming to a halt.

Cheers!

bleu

February 20, 2018

Off to see the Wizard

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“The power for creating a better future is contained in the present moment: You create a good future by creating a good present.” -Eckhart Tolle.

The last thing I remembered was struggling to get up off a floor that I had just fallen down to. Eventually exhausted, I drifted off into an unconscious state. This is how I was found, only later did I feel very lost. The next instance that I was conscious for, was waking up in a hospital bed about 650 miles away from the NewYork hotel bathroom floor I had fallen on. I was in a rehabilitation center after having had a massive stroke at 28 years old. Suddenly, I was thrust into a deep darkness that I felt there was no escape from. How do I get back to NYC and when!? This is all I asked my Parents about. Well, I’m still in recovery but my mind and my outlook of the future are not so bad anymore. In fact, there has been tremendous recovery because I got my mind and emotions onto a better train track. So, how do you divert your path after near imminent disaster? First of all give it time, nothing worth having(or achieving) happens instantaneously. Secondly, welcome as much positivity into your life as possible. Once you have taken time, and ingested a heavy dose of positivity you can begin steps to clean up the mess after the storm. Also, be on the lookout for any signs of progress however small. This will fuel you onto your bigger goals. Because, long term goals are made up of many short term goals. Give yourself grace, not everything will be perfect, moving forward not backwards is key. Not to mention, don’t bite off more than you can chew. Recovery from any disaster is a process. Finally, work SMART, and ask yourself if your goals are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time measured. All these things will help you rebuild your life after you’ve suffered a setback, whatever it may be.

bleu

August 18, 2015

future feature

“You can never plan the future by the past.” -Edmund Burke.

It’s no secret that psychics, fortune tellers, and tarot card readers are a sham and this is why I believe that. Because, as humans We have a mystical tool that allows us to shape our futures, a little thing called choices. However, many things occur to us that We did not choose, but even so you can still choose your perspective. Even when circumstances seem particularly bleak, you can choose to see the glass half full. If We could actually see the future, surely it would change or improve upon the decisions We do make. Therefore, many people seek out someone(or something) to help guide them on the path towards and through this unknown future landscape. Our need to know or control all aspects of our lives brings in the worrying thoughts, repetitive condemnations, questions, and fear. All this can culminate into a visit to a psychic. However, they are no more knowledgeable about the future than you are. This is comforting, because not knowing the future, means that anything is possible! Certainly knowing the future would have reassured my Parents when I was in the ICU of a hospital. Because there was no way at that present moment they could see this from where they sat inside my hospital room.

Photos: left, in ICU and right, in California 2 years later.

Even the Doctors, whom so closely monitored me at the time did not predict this. As you can see, the future is unpredictable by most if not all. This is good news, because it indicates that the future can radically change. When nothing is certain, anything is possible. Sometimes, you just have to let go, as much as you want to hang on. In letting go of absolute control, you allow peace to enter and can more readily enjoy the ride. It’s when I let go that I was able to let myself be surprised. If you can negate our human need to have control, you may just find some contentment, and peace of mind. In no way am I suggesting you fall like a leaf into the wind. Just that by releasing some of the burdens of striving it will allow more life to happen to you, rather than you happening to it. In doing so, you’ll be headed to your goal with less strife. Not to mention, if life was predictable it would be lackluster and unchallenging. It is in our challenges, that We find what were truly made of, and surprise ourselves. It’s in the unscripted pages of time that We find the many paths available to us. Be sure to tune into that small still voice inside, and follow the path that brings you life!

embrace the possibilities,

December 28, 2014

Behind the scenes

“Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.”- Wizard of Oz.
I finally decided to come out(not the closet)after talking to my Mum I decided I needed to have more transparency in my writing.
The truth as We all know it is that life is not a happy Facebook status.Just like a Broadway show a lot goes on behind the curtain, and it’s not always pretty. In the very early stages of my recovery I was deeply depressed and of the belief I had lost everything in the prime of my life.I can recall a Nurse from the Hospital mentioning how I used to(in, inpatient rehab) randomly yell out of nowhere.I know why I was doing this, it was because I absolutely thought I had lost everything so it would build up into random screams and even late night full on crying panic attacks.The unfortunate truth is that depression is a part of many of our lives.When I found myself at the end of my rope, hope in a future and recovering is what saved me.I know there are loads of medications to help you deal when things get jagged.However, in not wanting to subsist on a high dose of synthetic drugs,I decided to turn inward rather then outside of myself.What I discovered was that I am far stronger and more resilient then I had ever known and I also became more spiritual.Because in a time of desperation I needed more than positive thinking,I needed a miracle.In a search for my own remedies to maintain my sanity I came across ways to help other people.If nothing else this tragic event has produced things in me that has seemingly created a wiser “old soul,” so my friend here is a list of things to help you if you find yourself depressed.
Consume more omega 3 fatty acids.
Engaged activity.
Physical activity.
Sunlight exposure.
Social support.
Sleep.

For a more comprehensive detailed list hop over here.
In this ever winding journey may you always find the light and beauty.