“To the world you may just be someone, but to someone you may be the whole world.”
It’s strange and sometimes emotional when I unexpectedly(or expectantly)stumble across objects from my life in New York City. Essentially, while I was in a coma(not knowing if I would live)friends and family packed up my belongings and my apartment. So there I was out of commission and my life(hanging in the balance)packed away into numerous boxes. They made the trek from New York, to New Jersey,and then Michigan. While I eventually followed them. From time to time, I will be doing something and randomly see or find something that used to live in my New York apartment. With each object I find,it opens up the flood gate of memories. I can remember when I bought it,where it was from,what I did that day,and see it in it’s place in my apartment. Every object holds a story. Since my life has taken a radical turn, these objects afford me the feelings that I imagine a true explorer gets. When my eyes and fingers touch upon an object from my life before the massive stroke, I feel like an Alien discovering something from a past civilization,of a time gone by. This is because the situation I’m in now seems so unreal. Although the objects are not foreign to me,in some way they are. Why? Because before I was completely unaware of the reality that I’m enduring now. This has given me the point of view of an outsider. When I’m holding something in my hand(or gaze) I can actually take it in as if it weren’t mine. Leaving me to see it in a new way. In the way that an explorer might see something and wonder what kind of life it once had. Although I know the life of my own belongings, I miss the girl that bought them. I’ve been in what seems like an alternate universe for the past two years. I’ve been working on bringing that girl back from the other universe. I remember everything,but even so I worry I’ll forget. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be able to walk freely,tie a shoe,run,jump,and generally be able to control my body. Those objects remind me of the girl I used to be(physically)and I want Her back. I even think back to how oblivious I was to the struggles I now face(and have) wishing I could somehow eke out some of those feelings back into the present. How fortunate I was to be unaware of the things I know now! Those objects hold this other universe within them. I wonder what I would do if I had known then, what I know now. Ah,yes it’s the age old question,and the answer is everything. We take so much for granted, that it’s so important to live and enjoy life as much as you can.
Cheers!
