They call me Mr. X

Ughhhhh……Another blurry eyed morning. One could expect no different when waking up at the ungodly hour of 5 A.M. The alarm was smashed months ago and yet small pieces can still be found by your foot… when you get a plastic shard stuck into the bottom of it. The red seeps up to the surface as you hop around swearing. It had shattered rather easily as the force behind it was great. Ever taken physics? Me neither. Boring shit. But I suppose there is some law about this type of occurrence in there somewhere… No matter, I still wake up on time anyways because it seems my internal alarm and the external one were in kahootz. They were probably in love and so…since the death of its counterpart happened by my hands its exacting some sick twisted revenge on me…… hm. Maybe I’m just not a morning person.

“Not to mention your suit is a crumpled up mess.” Sam.

I haven’t used an iron since, well…..the incident, but if I hang my suit up just right, the shower steam works alright, and besides I don’t care enough about my job to be “wrinkle free” anyhow, what do they expect? I could wear a polyester suit but then I’d sweat balls and look like a fucking lounge lizard. (And not the ones that get loads of girls either…) Hmmm do they?

“Get girls??? of course they do! They get all kinds. Mostly the ones who are looking for love and attention that they didn’t get from their Fathers so they try boys who then try to become men and if that fails, they try God or politics. Pffft. How do you figure all the politicians get laid? God on the other hand, well I don’t know about him…hey, have you seen the neighbor girl lately? I’d sure like summa that.. Mmmm Mm!” Sam.

I need some orange juice. I LOVE orange juice, well as much as you can love something that you can’t copulate with or write sonnets to. I drink so much I actually got a cavity from it, go figure, its supposed to be good for you but it rots your teeth out….at least it did mine.. everything in moderation I suppose.

“HA! Moderation??? What do you know about that?! Night after night you—–“


After my orange juice I like to take a looonng shower, as it’s one of the few moments in the day where I get a release. A physical release from the sore aching muscles, a sexual release to rev up my endorphins and a mental release to pretend, at least for a moment that I’m actually clean. Soon after that its business as usual. I watch my bosses leech their way past peoples borders, like the mussels that sneak into foreign bodies of water on the hull of a ship, only then to disengage and populate in its new found territory, slowly destroying the local eco-system… What I do is not pretty, not pretty like the strawberry blonde in her high heels that lives next door. Too bad she isn’t legal yet… no matter, she serves her purpose in my daily morning shower routine well enough… maybe I need to find something to cling to like those lost girls….. because right now my convictions are few if any.

“The only thing you believe in is that white powder you like the smell of so much..” Sam, this time with even more of a horrific sneer on his face.


My Therapist said if I ignored this, it would go away, it would all go away, the world I lived in would fall away from me in pieces like a crumbling wall, or break like my alarm clock against that plaster wall… I only wish it would.

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