If love tears us apart,tragedy brings us together.


“Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.” -Charlie  Chaplin.

Through my recovery I’ve discovered an invisible divide.  Even when  surrounded by people in the general public, I felt as if I was on the other side of a chasm. Because while I could physically reach out and touch another person, they were still miles away.  I could voice what I was going through, but nothing quite explains it like shared experience does.  Fortunately, that chasm  feels like it’s getting more narrow. I’ve   even found myself happy when a friend came to me with  something  scary or possibly tragic that had happened. While I certainly don’t wish for anything bad to befall them, I found myself becoming comfortable in the space of rehabilitation(mind,body,and soul) it was in these places where broken people came to be  “fixed,” that I was at ease. Am I broken? No, but perhaps  the world  would generally see it that way. It was in rooms   for rehabilitation, that I wished my friends could be there too. As if it were some type of inclusive club, I wanted them to join too.  If common interests bring two people into friendship, it’s a tragedy that can truly meld them together. I didn’t like being on the other side of an invisible wall watching the world  pass by me. A world that had  jobs,social lives,significant others,the ability to drive,independence,freedom,and went to bed every night without  having to wear braces or go to therapy, but generally their time was spent how they  wanted. I felt as though my life,time,and freedom of choice had been hijacked by  the  most evil of beings.  I   desired to bring a friend into my  “fishbowl,”not to  commiserate, but to relate.  Bonds are built and strengthened when you go through a tragedy with someone. It  beats you up initially, then it leaves you open. In the aftershock,you stumble around   and bump into other confused  victims.  In meeting them you can  understand and  relate to the bandages that both of you now need.  I don’t consider myself a victim,but rather a survivor,and  what do survivors do? They  take the lessons  learned to rebuild, fight back, and become stronger. Because of  that initial beating I’ve had to  rebuild too and that’s exactly what I’m doing.

– Keep on your boxing gloves,


6 Comments on If love tears us apart,tragedy brings us together.

  1. Lynne Suszek
    May 28, 2015 at 12:51 pm (8 years ago)

    Yes and even more lonely is the world of believing you are recovering. It’s a category that doesn’t exist for someone with certain injuries or conditions such as paralysis. Long-term injuries are different than even sickness. I’m not sick but actually very healthy. So I don’t fit in with diseases either. I also do not feel like I belong in support groups of the spinal cord injuries because I’m not on the pity party train. I’m leaving that world behind, so where do I fit in now? It is a fishbowl of sorts, I agree. It’s a Limbo that needs recognition. I call it a place in-between. I’m not allowing myself to be in the “permanently injured” or handicapped arena. I’m healed inside; I’m normal, well and free in a body that isn’t fully cooperating. Thanks for expressing this. That’s why I blog. I will use this for my next blog. Amen sister!

    • Leah
      May 28, 2015 at 2:57 pm (8 years ago)

      Lynn, it seems that the world likes extremes, leaving little room for the middle. This can be seen with political parties and in Congress for example. You have a good point. Also, what is your blog address!?😀

      • lynnesuszek
        May 28, 2015 at 4:39 pm (8 years ago)

        Thanks Leah, my blog is Hisabilityblog.com

      • Leah
        May 28, 2015 at 5:39 pm (8 years ago)

        Yay, I’m going to check it out! I also forgot to mention that paralysis isn’t an irreversible thing. There are many brain studies that demonstrate and back up evidence of how our brains continually learn and are able to be changed throughout our lives. There is no “window,” of time in which you have to recover, but you can change your brain for a number of years.. 🙂 I actually have some instruction on crossover(using both sides of the brain)which aims to get things firing,and improves ability. I will have to share it with you once I learn more. At any rate, God bless and focus more on ABILITY rather then those three little letters d-i-s Xoxo!

  2. lynnesuszek
    May 28, 2015 at 6:32 pm (8 years ago)

    Yes I focus on HIS ability in me to achieve the impossible by natural means. I study Dr Caroline Leaf, brain scientist, quite a lot and blog it. I think it helps to know that we can re-route signals in the brain or in my case, the spinal cord. I know that paralysis is reversible by way of God’s “Power that worketh in me” so that’s where my faith is. However, doctors and therapists don’t offer much hope by natural means.They dont even recognize or acknowledge improvement when they see it in me. The medicaI professionals I have, know I believe in the miraculous and for some reason do not encourage my faith, even though studies prove that hope is a driving force that outshines a life of “accepting your situation.” So even though I don’t value their opinion, it does affect my belief in my heart. Slowly this is changing though and our testimonies will change the world of paralysis. There is a Cure and I’m raising awareness, one blog at a time.

    • Leah
      May 28, 2015 at 6:53 pm (8 years ago)

      Amen to that! I actually just watched Wendy’s testimony,and She is very right in that you have to focus on the solution rather then the problem,and healing follows. I definitely need to do the same,because at times I become racked with fear and worry 🙁 Also,yes therapists and Doctors seem to offer the opposite of that(it’s terrible really) thankfully We know better! I can’t imagine how horrible it would be if you didn’t know. 🙁


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